9.11

What things have changed and how life has moved on since this tragic day in our nation's history. Sadness encompasses me at every turn. From 9.11 commercials, documentaries, websites and photographs, I cannot get away from those images burned in my memory.

As a high school student, the day this happened I walked from class to class to watch news reporter after news reporter try and convey this awful, dismal, terrorist attack on us. I listened to guess after guess of why the airplane hit the building. Terrorism never entered their minds...until they caught on live TV the second plane purposefully crash into the building. Then- we knew. 

The hairs on our arms stuck up. Our guts tightened and grew sick. Tears filled our eyes and a lump grew in our throat too big to swallow. What...was going to become of us?

Then we came together and we dug through the rubble and found our loved ones...some were on the news begging for anyone to let them know if their loved one had been seen...days grew into weeks...some people survived...many did not.

Flags were hung at half staff. Boots that once were used to march into the battlefield now held the lost soldier's gun and dog tags. Blood stained helmets lay broken on the pavement. 9.11 made widows, children fatherless, motherless and parents it made childless. And yet...we joined hands and hearts and sang out 

"O beautiful for heroes prov'd
In liberating strife,
Who more than self their country loved,
And mercy more than life!

America! America!
God shed His grace on thee,
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!"

We came together and we fought back, vowing to never retreat or surrender but to redeem those lost souls! And come what may, we did our best. And like they always do, politics found a way to root its ugly head into the midst and we lost focus. Still, 10 years later we have not forgotten...and I know, we never will. In spite of what our history books may or may not say in the future, my children will know what events took place on the fateful day, because I was there. I saw with my eyes the crashes and the fire. I saw the towers fall. And I saw heroes run in those buildings and I saw victims fall from them. I saw...and I cried.

I'm just glad I'm in God's hands.

Here's a great song to remind you of all it takes to be an American...and all it means!

If tomorrow all the things were gone
I'd worked for all my life,
And I had to start again
with just my children and my wife,
I'd thank my lucky stars
to be living here today,
'Cause the flag still stands for freedom
and they can't take that away.


I'm proud to be an American
where at least I know I'm free,
And I won't forget the men who died
who gave that right to me,
And I gladly stand up next to you
and defend her still today,
'Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land
God Bless the U.S.A.

From the lakes of Minnesota
to the hills of Tennessee,
Across the plains of Texas
from sea to shining sea.
From Detroit down to Houston
and New York to L.A.,
There's pride in every American heart
and it's time we stand and say:


I'm proud to be an American
where at least I know I'm free,
And I won't forget the men who died
who gave that right to me,
And I gladly stand up next to you
and defend her still today,
'Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land
God Bless the U.S.A.

"For the 97 Billionth time- Do You Have to Go Pee!?"

We are potty training in the Moore house!! Yaaaaay! Can't you just hear the excitement?! :) 

Actually, I am pretty excited because Charlie is a potty training genius! 

The first day, Tuesday, he peed every 17-20 minutes! Whew! Day one down- a lifetime more to go!!

The second day he went a little longer, about every 1/2 hour! We only had one accident when we went outside to play Mommy had to come back in to get something and she shut the sliding glass door and Charlie couldn't get back in, so he peed his pants. :( But that was Mommy's fault...

The third day, today-- he's been great! A little mishap here this morning because Charlie found it more fun to play than to stop to go potty. I had asked him if he needed to go and he said, "nope." But by the time he realized he did have to go, he had went a little in his underwear then ran to the potty.

All in all, I haven't really scolded him or anything. He's just learning and I fully expect him to forget, to make mistakes and learn from them! We already bought him a prize for doing so well!! We put a pull up on him and went out for dinner- potty chair in the van, mind you (public potty's for toddlers- ick!) and then we went to Wal-Mart to buy Gordon, but they didn't have Gordon, so we got Henry instead! That made his week!!! He didn't even have an accident while we were out- which amazed me!

I hope it keeps going this well.

Here's a picture for your enjoyment. ;)

His favorite underwear!!

Charlie & Dr. Dave!!

Today we took Charlie to see Dr. Dave!! He's a Pediatric Dentist with a mile long list of credentials including serving two terms as President of Dental Staff at Cincinnati Children's and being the Zoo Dentist!! What an amazing man!! Here are some pics!

 Pictures of Zoo animals getting their very large teeth cleaned!

 Mrs. Kim, our RDH!

 Charlie enjoying his new Cars toothbrush!

 He got to put water in the cup and rinse his mouth! He liked that very much!

 Wesley even got a Banana toothbrush which he really liked!!

 Getting ready for the polish! 

 A very nervous Charlie!

 A different view for me, since I'm usually the one with the mask and gloves! ;)

 It's hard to tell, but the prophy angle is a penguin!! Cute!!

 All Done!! Charlie even told Mrs. Kim, "Thank yooou!"

 After all the goodies we got, they even let Charlie pick a toy form the prize box! He picked 3 cars! Surprise!

Dr. Dave! 

Charlie's 2 year molars began poking through last night- so we'll be watching them until they come in fully! He also has deep grooves which I already knew, so we'll definitely have to watch out for cavities! Also, just like I thought, the spacing of his teeth means braces are likely for his permanent teeth! But we'll worry about that later! 

Charlie said "Thank you" to Dr. Dave as well and we left!

See you in 6 months guys!!

Wedding Bells at the Verdin Bell Event Center!

As most of you know, my bestest friend Sarah Lance took her husband Brian's last name on Sunday evening 14 August 2011, and she is now Mrs. Sarah Kilgore!! 

I was privileged with the opportunity to photograph this special time in her life! However, I was also extremely worried during the rehearsal because the lighting was very low- and my 171' flash could barely keep up and seemed more like a 12' flash! It was a beautiful, old church that had a billion photo ops, that at times got overwhelming because you want to get "everything" but the bridal party have to keep moving to get to the next step...so you can only do what time allows. A more seasoned photographer would have had no problem with this; but I did get some amazing shots in the mix, so hopefully any imperfections in my photography will be made up for by these shots.

Really, I don't care if anyone else likes the photos- if Sarah and Brian love them then I will be the happiest person alive. I did this for them. And them alone. Still, I think they will be liked by all!

My first wedding to shoot was a military wedding! Few things in life are as glamorous as a military wedding and I'm so happy for her that she was able to finally marry a man in uniform!! My favorite part of the night was when Captain Eric slapped her on the rear after she entered the Sabre arch and yelled, "Welcome to the Army, Mrs. Kilgore!!" PRICELESS!! :) 

Her hand carved love bird cake toppers painted wearing exactly what they were wearing was a true gem on the beautifully decorated cake! Elegance could be found at every turn! Dozens of candles lit up the huge altar and the stain glassed windows let in many small glimpses of refracted light- and to top it all off the ceremony was very sweet. I begged myself not to cry and instead capture as many moments as my flash would allow. 

I am making them a wedding album which I started on a while ago. I have 603 pictures to go through and edit and place in just the perfect place of their album. I have permission to post it on FB as soon as the Bride and Groom get the album in hand!! It will be something neat to see, so stay tuned! Also, Jeff made the "Just Married" sign for the back of the side car of the Harley! It was my idea but he stole it and ran with it!! Not what I would have done, but it worked! I told her I was going to follow her down the road like a mom follows a Kindergartener to school for the first time!! But, I resisted the urge and just waved with teary eyes as she vanished. She waved for as long as we could see her...ok, I'm tearing up, so different subject!

Some things about that night went according to plan- others did not. But thankfully, God was with me and I know because my nerves were kept clam and my camera flash still worked after being dropped on a marble table, busting out its batteries and the metering cover! Mishaps happen. You just have to stay clam and move forward. 

I surprised myself at how confident I was at something I had never done before and under harsh (lighting) conditions. I think I grew a lot from that experience and I hope I continue to grow in my passion for photography. Although, as tough as that was- I think it will be my last wedding. I will never wince again at a photographer's price for weddings- they deserve every dollar! 

My husband told one of the event planners that I was a little nervous because it was my first wedding and she looked at him like she was surprised at that (again, God gets the credit here!) and she said, "I heard she was very special to the Bride." :) Aw!! The Bride was very special to me- and I could not have imagined a better companion for her, than Major Brian Kilgore!!

Here's to their Happiness Forever After!

Love you guys- enjoy your honeymoon in GREECE!!!

Why Big Families Might Be Easier

 I found this on some random blog (I'm kind of a blog stalker!) and I thought, "I have to re-post this!" I hope it makes you laugh like it did me! I love big families!!

Written by Matthew Archibold-Feb. 4, 2010

WHY BIG FAMILIES MIGHT BE EASIER
A woman said to me recently that my five children were very well behaved. It's one of the best things I can hear so I thanked her. Then she asked me "how do you do it with so many?" I told her that I don't think I'd be a very good parent of one child or two. She didn't believe my answer but honest to goodness, I sometimes think that having many children is easier than just one.
Why big families are easier:

~Patience. I never have to teach patience. My children know that I can't drop everything for them if I have a baby in my arms.

~Work Ethic. My children have learned to work because there are always chores to do in a small house packed with little messy lunatics. And they all learn quickly that sometimes they have to clean up a mess even though they didn't make it.

~Humility. My children have learned it's not always their turn. They've accepted they can't always get their way because other people have to get their way sometimes. They've learned that some children are better at certain things than they are.

~Foreign language skills. You can learn a lot of Spanish by watching ten years of Dora the Explorer that you just can't pick up in two. And now with the Diego spin off I'm practically fluent.

~Laughter. The children have learned to laugh at the insane non sequiturs of younger siblings. They've learned that laughing just feels better when seven people are doing it along with you.

~Competition. Do I really need to go into this? Everything is a competition in big families. The children compete over who reads faster, who drinks their milk faster, who gets to the bathroom first...etc. Everything is a competition and they're all keeping score.

~Balance. The floor of the front room of my home is a minefield of toys and childhood paraphernalia. Just walking through the room requires great skill and balance. I'm absolutely convinced my two year old will be a favorite for Gold on the balance beam in the 2016 Olympics. (She might have to lay off the cookies a little but I'll deal with that later.)

~Life isn't fair. Sometimes you just give it to the baby because you want a little quiet. Not all the time. But sometimes.

~Just say "No." Being able to say "no" may be the most undervalued skill in this world. The need to be liked is pervasive. The need to be cool even more so. Having brothers and sisters teaches children to say "no" about 143 times a day. It's a good skill.

~Praying. They learn that nothing beats praying together as a family.

~Nature/Nurture. Having many children has taught me that nature has a lot more to with who my kids are than nurture. This is helpful, especially when your children misbehave you don't have to feel bad about it. Just say "Stupid nature!!!" and blame your spouse's genes.

~Name-calling. You can occasionally call your child by the wrong name and still not be considered a terrible parent. They know who you mean just from your tone. Sometimes if you need something done you can call the wrong name and someone will still show up. That helps.

~Spying. My children have learned that they can't get away with anything. I have spies who look a lot like them who are willing to drop the dime on them for anything. Even at school I've got a child in just about every grade. If they do something I'll hear. That keeps them nervous. And I like keeping my kids a little nervous.

~Friendship. The children have many friends. They've got girly friends, crying friends, fun loving friends, consoling friends, and crazy friends. And they all have the same last name. And they'll be there forever for each other. No matter what.

~Love. I think my children have learned to love because there are others around them to love and who love them. I honestly can think of no better way to teach children to love than siblings.

My favorite are the last two...in a big family your children have many friends who will be there for them other forever...and they are loved by so many more and love so much more!!

You Owe Me Nothing...

As you may know, Jeff and I just got back from Whitewater Rafting on the New River which is located in Oak Hill, West Virgina. It was an amazing time with perfect weather!! If you and your family are looking for some adventure then you should visit River Expeditions for more information!! You won't be disappointed!

As well as rafting, our church group also had marriage sessions on video by Charles Stanley's son, Andy, who is also a Pastor.  The series was called iMarriage. Everyone who comes in contact with this series will benefit from it. Let me just say, it will revolutionize marriage as we know it!

Here are some things I got from this seminar- you may also find these videos and workbooks online here. 

No.1: Ask yourself, "What does my Spouse owe me?" And really take a moment and answer to the best of your ability what you think your spouse owes you. 

If you're like me, you didn't put material things, but you put things like, "fidelity, unconditional love, communication, best efforts in caring for our family..."

Everyone has hopes and dreams and wishes and desires for their marriage and their life. These are God-given aspirations to grow, learn, be complete, share, give, receive and so forth.

The husband walks down the isle with desires for his new marriage.

The bride walks down the isle holding her box of desires.

But somewhere after the honeymoon or the carrying over the threshold- those boxes of desires gets dumped into a great big box of EXPECTATIONS.

The bride says after a few years of marriage, "What about that house you said we were going to live in."

The husband says, "How come the house is a mess or dinner is never done on time? At my house we ate dinner at 5 o'clock on the dot." Etc...

What we once desired from our other half is now what we DESERVE...and expect.

Now, it's not that you should never have desires- remember, these are God-given. However, when the house is clean when you come home and you expect it- there is no room for "Gee honey the house looks great!" because all she did was reach the bar you set- she's just reached your expectations. Same for the other way around. If honey comes home on time for dinner, there's no throwing your arms around him and saying "I'm so glad you're home!" because he's just supposed to come home, right?

Well, in answering the above question- your Spouse owes you NOTHING. Not his love. Not her fidelity. Absolutely, positively nothing. 

See, God sent His only son to die in your place. You sinned- you deserve death. But Jesus was your sacrifice. He owed you nothing yet He gave. And you are His tool through which He loves your Spouse. And whether or not your spouse does for you good things, or loves you or throws your love in the gutter...they will answer to God for that- and you will answer to God for the way you love your spouse. 

Just as we say, "God- thank You for forgiving my sins. Thank You Lord for loving me" we should also apply that idea to our spouse. If they abuse your love you say "Thank you Lord for your grace and mercy...I was so thankful for what You did for me that I just loved him anyway...He took my love and he abused it but I loved Him anyway because You loved me!"

See, when you look at it as your God-given job to love your spouse because Christ loved you- you do it with humility. It's a covenant. Not a contract.

Andy Stanley gave the example of a debt/debtor relationship. He said, "My mortgage company doesn't send me a letter saying 'Andy, you've been such a good customer in paying your mortgage on time we just wanted to bestow our gratitude and send you this gift card so you can take Sandra out to dinner." We all laughed! How true!!

But they WILL send you a letter if you miss a payment. Oh, you'll get all kinds of attention if you fail to live up to your end of the deal. That's a debt/debtor relationship. There's no room for love in one of those. That's a contract.

Again, Jesus owed us nothing- we owed Him. But He forgave us- died for us- and loves us. We are grateful because of it. Just as He says we don't owe Him- our spouse does not owe us either. They are not our mortgage company. Why then, do we only give attention to when they mess up or don't meet our "expectations"? 

See, if they meet our EXPECTATIONS- that's fine. That's what they're supposed to do. They've just met our standards. There's no extra hug or kind word or gratitude for what they have done. No thankfulness.

But when you look at it like a covenant instead of a contract there is love. Instead of it being "I" it's "i". A litte i marriage is intimate. A debt/debtor relationship destroys intimacy. Expectations of your spouse immediately changes the dynamics of the relationship. 

You love your spouse not the way they deserve to be loved, but the way God deserves to be loved.

So what are we supposed to do with our dreams and desires if they're not supposed to be fulfilled?

You be thankful when they are. That's it. You don't expect it but when it happens, even if it happened by accident when the other person didn't even mean to do it- you write a little note and put it somewhere they'll find it later- and tell them how much what they did meant to you and that you love them so much. 

You don't decide and pretend that your desires aren't there. That's a coping mechanism when we're hurt or depressed about something and that's not good to just say, "well, I didn't want that anyway..."

Don't say, "well, because you didn't meet my needs then I'm not going to meet yours either." Because what you're really saying to the other person is "I am as disinterested in this marriage as you are." And that's a dangerous message to send.

1st Peter 5:5 talks about Biblical humility. You choose to put your spouses needs ahead of your own. Why? Because God resists the proud. He says so. He gives grace to the humble. 

Andy also had a rope tied around the big I that he used as his example of an "I" marriage. He explained that when one person has a rope tied around the other person that's more like parenting- "and you didn't get married so you could have a third one of these". Some people that have a ope tied around their spouse, when the other spouse does something good, "ok, you came home at 6:30 sweetie so I'm going to go ahead and let you...dadadada...." fill in the blank with whatever. Brother Andy said that will work...but who wants that? 

You know the example of the triangle- where God is the head at the top of the triangle and you and your spouse are at each bottom corner. When you are living in a way that is pleasing to the Lord you climb that triangle and become closer and closer to God. And don't keep looking over to your spouses side to see if they're keeping up with you. It's between you and God and you're just supposed to love your spouse- you are God's arms when you hug that person. God uses YOU to love that person for Him! How amazing and powerful that thought is!! Almost too big to wrap my mind around- 

God put Jeff in my life so that I could love him for God!!! Brings me to tears every time I think about it! And because God loved me he put Jeff in my life to love me for God. His tangible love- His arms that comfort me are Jeff's!! How amazing that not only does God not expect anything from me- but He loves me so much He wanted to show me through Jeff! 

I hope, if you are married, that you take these notes and apply them to your marriage. So that you can have an iMarriage. Little i. Big marriage! Don't forget to look for this series and have a marriage party and invite your friends! It is so profound and yet simple. It's stirred my heart and made me see love as not something I'm owed but as something I'm given freely. And I can't help but cry with a grateful heart and thank my husband for loving me; because after all- he doesn't have to.

After 9 years of Marriage:

1. Marriage isn't about marrying the right person, but doing the right thing.
2. Jeff can't complete me, only Christ can complete me.
3. Marriage isn't about feelings but building a life together.
4. His family is my family.
5. The purpose of marriage is ONENESS - God either sees both of us or He sees neither one of us.
6. Marriage is a covenant - not a contract!
7. I will have an affair with Jeff, constantly :-)
8. The best gift I can give to Charley and Wesley is a healthy marriage.
9. Having God #1, Jeff #2 and Kids #3 - doesn't mean I'm neglecting my children.
10. I'm committed to fall in love with Jeff over and over again!
11. I want to grow old with Jeff!
12. Calling and ministry are a lot easier to fulfill when Jeff is your husband.
13. At age 27, nothing compares in life to wake up besides Jeff every morning!
14. I treat Jeff the way I pray my sons will treat their wife, one day.
15. Jeff treats me to the way Charley and Wesley will, one DISTANT day, they will allow their wives to treat them.
16. If I could do it all over again, I would choose Jeff every time...

Once Upon A Lifetime...

I've been thinking a lot about what I want out of life. What can I put into my life and the lives of those around me? I feel like there's something out there-great- for me to accomplish, but what is it?

This past Sunday my friends' Pastor, Greg Locke, of Global Vision Bible Church challenged us to start a life list- things we want to accomplish in our life. He said keeping it at a minimum would be better than having a long list. So, here is my list of 5.

Number 1: Value People Everyday

This may be a bit different than the typical "travel the world" but to me it is more important. What I do here on earth for the glory of God far outweighs any self fulfilling trips or materialistic properties. When I lay my head on my pillow I want to know that I added value to someone's life. I want that person to be better because they met me, because they had an uplifting, joyful conversation with me. I want to have the kind of disposition that tells them I am different and they want to know why. I don't tip based on what kind of serve I'm given I tip on what kind of Christian I am. If I'm a waitress who couldn't make my last bill, can't get my kid shots he needed, or had an argument with my husband, the last thing I need is to be de-vauled because I got your order mixed up. People are human, just like me. In a world that popularizes de-valuing people I want to be different. Not so that I can get a pat on the back but because my Father in Heaven is glorified when I esteem others better than myself. More than being loved, when I am gone, I want to be missed...missed because I valued people.

Number 2: Manage My Decisions

This one is a tough one. Did you know that the critical time for managing your decisions is 14 days? Just think of New Years Resolutions and diets. 14 days into the decision the brain begins to stop managing the decision and you must actively pursue the management or else it fails. At this point in my life there are several very important decisions that are being made and we are passed some of the critical times and just beginning the critical time in other decisions. Prayer has been the only way I have found to manage them.  I heard a quote that goes like this, "With every decision you are either preparing for greatness or repairing from the failure". Making a decision can be easy. Managing the decision when it gets tough is not. Right now, I am preparing for greatness. The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 9:10 (I think!) that whatsoever your hands find to do, do it with all your might! You and I only have 1 life to live- so let's live it to the best of our ability!

Number 3: Become Bigger on the Inside than I am on the Outside

I find it so easy to be this "big" person on the inside. Even when I'm not even trying- that's how easy it is. The more you are in the world, around worldly influences, the easier it is to be like them. Rude. Short with people. Feel smarter or better than others.  I can't allow my attitude to reflect a negative image if I am to be a Christian. There's nothing good or attractive about a person that is rude and like Brother Junior Hill described as 'sand paper'. Meekness is having the position to put someone in their place but being under control and not doing so just because you can. You shouldn't let your position affect your disposition. I've heard the saying, "Don't let your reputation get bigger than your Character." Who I am when no one is looking is who I really am. What does this teach my children?

Job was the best example of being bigger on the inside than he was on the outside. A rich man- loved my friends and family- he had it all!! And Satan told God that Job only loved him because of the things he had- and God said you can do whatever you want to him but don't kill him. We all know this story. His finances were taken. His children were killed. His wife  said (whom you realize Satan did not kill because in the eyes of God Job and Mrs. Job were one flesh) to him "curse God and die" but Job, being bigger on the inside said "The LORD giveth and He taketh away- blessed be the name of the Lord"!!! What an amazing testimony Job is!

Number 4: Express Generosity Everyday

This one seems simple- too simple to put on a life list, right? Well, in a selfish world I think we have more influences to do what matters to "Me" than do what matters to someone else. Everything is instant gratification- what can I get out of this, "it's not fair you have it so I should too". That's totally opposite of what the Bible teaches. You wouldn't believe how being generous to someone makes their day! Because it's so uncommon anymore! Getting something off the top shelf in the grocery store for a little old lady means so much! Buying a friends lunch, sending a card in the mail to someone who's had a crisis or surgery or some other matter can be the one thing that brings them a smile. Why is it that doing good for others has gone by the way side and the only thing that matters is the mighty dollar and the next newest tech-y gadget?? People are worth so much more than this!

Number 5: Raise Godly Children that Win More and Do More for the Lord than I Ever Could

I'm a book girl- anyone who knows me knows I've got my nose wedged between the pages of a book whenever there's a chance! Mostly that's in the evenings so not too many people get to see what I'm reading. My latest book is "The Flipside of Feminism: What Conservative Women Know and Men Can't Say" and it is awesome! Let me just say, it's so true!! But anyway, that's not my topic- the next book I'm getting is called "Prayers and Promises for My Little Boy" by Stormie O'Martian. She's a great author and the thing is, she writes about things that are important- always with prayer! My life will be great if the things that matter and the lessons I learn are taught and carried on by my children, right now, 2 boys. I want to teach them to be MEN in every leadership, care-taker, and Provider way they can be. In this day and age men are merely inconveniences to most women and Dad's are beaten down before they even become men. It's a shame like most everything else popular today.

While traveling the world and many other fun things on a typical to-do list are enjoyable and may be something accomplished in this life for me, they are not what makes me happy and they will not leave a legacy behind for those younger generations to see. I want to be active in my church, my community and in my own family. Teaching, giving, loving, caring and putting a new sense of value in everyone I meet. And hopefully bring someone to know Christ as I do so that He can make them as happy, content, and fulfilled as I am!